Saturday, 10 June 2017

I want to breathe

As I stepped into IGI Airport I went through low phase of end of holidays. A family holiday one looks forward to all year. Moments of fun & laughter were all replaying in my mind. Yes it is a normal emotion everyone goes through when good things like these come to an end. But we walked towards immigration. Impressed with the speed & great attitude of the officer I was relaxed. Waiting at the belt for my luggage I wasn't irritated this time as I used to be earlier. Coz I had experienced so many Air delays & chaos at US Airports that this looked Pretty fast

While waiting at belt with not slept for 24 hours I saw an old couple struggling to pick up heavy luggage & put that on trolley. All three of us with same reaction went & helped them put the same on trolley & drag to exit gate.

So far so good. Then comes the Indian style. All private cars parked anywhere & everywhere & looked liked a fair where all one can witness is honks & traffic jams with not a single traffic police guy around.

Suddenly reminded me of last day in New York when a car was being towed away by police officers for wrong parking. When I asked what would be the fine? Reply was a 1000 dollars. And if he fails to pay his car will be auctioned & licence cancelled for life.

Any ways then comes the famous Mahipalpur Road. Where all constructions are illegal. Surprised that the main road which connects South Delhi to the Airport has been left the same way for decades now. As you pass outside Saket Metro station the congestion created by Auto guys & Gramin Seva who have licence to park anywhere & anytime blocking entire traffic behind

As I was about to sleep I started thinking of that old couple whom we helped with heavy luggage. How come it was an instant reaction of three of us? Are we really that compassionate always? No I realised that this was normal reaction as we were away from negativity of news channels & somewhere had spent such happy moments together that all this came naturally

No this blog isn't about putting US above India. We are great country. Met a lady on Coffee table from Canada. She said she dying to visit India but will do when have sufficient funds. When visited NASA Space Centre they were all in praise of ISRO going places & that got a rush of blood in our veins. That feeling of being proud Indian. When my flight got delayed & chatting with my friends on twitter & finally India winning made me dance as if no one watching. US is dying. Wrinkled faces. Obese youngsters. Streets filled with beggars. India on other hand is young & talented. I have practically visited entire world & my gratitude to my country for making me capable of doing that

But still there are harsh realities on which I have given up so the thought of moving out & settling in a small Scandinavian country

  • A place where I can simply have tap water no RO or more Neral water required
  • A place where I am not scared of food adulteration as laws are too strict for anyone to indulge
  • A place where my son & me go cycling without fear of bad traffic or being smashed by a drunk driver with no fear of law
  • A place where I can wear what I want to & stroll at nights fearlessly. Without being called "chalu " as it happens here
  • A place where friends go out for a long drive from one city to other. Stop at gas station & buy chilled beer & enjoy. Yes the person behind sterling will not dare to drink as he is too scared of law catching up
  • A place where on beach I wear whatever I feel best & no one is even bothered. Unlike here where I got most vulgar comments on posting a small pic
  • A place like Times Square where at 2 at night I can sing & dance with my friends. Police all over but neither do they harass or bother you
  • A place where I shall never need anti allergies & go out jogging in fresh air rather than paying huge fees to gym here coz running out will harm more than good
  • A place where police as sniffer dogs to check for carrying drugs to place like Turks & Caicos but will not ban late night parties as in Goa
  • A place where I am not judged with amount of jewellery I am wearing but If I am wearing a smile on my face.
  • A place where I greet any stranger with a smile not with a scare that he will will feel I making an advance

I know India will do very well. Will be super power by 2030. GDP in double figures. Sensex at 1 lac plus. Make in India will be big success. I can go on & on 

But will our mindset change? It might but may be few decades. Till then my youth would have been over. My son does not carry tag of SC ST or minority. I don't want him to waste his teenage in coaching centres & then end in disappointment that even with 95 plus he struggles to get subject of his choice. I hate when people burn national properties with no fear of law. All this affects me emotionally.

I will earn one tenth of what I earn today. Will not own fancy car. Will not be able to travel business. But I will breathe in freedom to eat, drink & wear what I want without being judged. I can be friends with any man but will not be trolled for having an affair with him. My son will not drive a Merc but will breathe air when cycling to his work place. Not carrying water bottle. Just stop & drink any place.

I know I will be trolled for this blog.But this is the truth. Outside India my identity is a human being and then an Indian. In India I am a Hindu or a jain or SC or Muslim or Christian or a Tamil or Jat.......No I just want to live as a soul. 


  1. Madam u r true...this blog cmes from ur heart che u hve gone and realised all things hope for better and safe future of india

  2. Real feelings worded rightly. It will take few generations and perhaps few leaders like Modi to make changes on the mindset of average Indians. We like minded people should rather be the change if we want to see the change. Going away will sure give us instantly what is ideal but our contribution will be zero. Best wishes Renukaji.

    1. Trying to. But sometimes it is race against time and you feel very difficult to make few understand

  3. Troll. I think on the contrary people will instantly connect with your blog. Such honest thoughts.

  4. Troll. I think on the contrary people will instantly connect with your blog. Such honest thoughts.

  5. People like us are a minority. What u saw coming out of igi is the majority, the real india. If 100 crore out of 125 cr are like that, then they are the real india, not ppl like us.

  6. I got instantly connected with this blog of yours ma'am. Straight from the heart and something which I can relate to.

  7. When I was a young boy of 10 in early 50s in Madras ( not Chennai) I could go by cycle to my school 2.5 miles away crossing Mount Road ( not anna salai). Even on 60s I could pedal to my college 6 Kms away. No pollution as we were under developed country ( before political correctness). On holidays our family used to walk 5 Kms to Marina beach and return back at 10 or 11PM, though my dad had car to go to the high court where he was practising.
    We were conservative in Madras but my uncle who lived with us had a best friend who was a Muslim. We all are together sitting around the dining table ( not that conservative). In that busy road we lived in my father's house was known as Vakil's house, eventhough at one end of the road there was the mansion of CP. I had to appear twice before getting my driving license, as actually I was tested and the first time the engine conked off. No excuse was allowed. If you didn't have light in your cycle in the night you were penalised. People believed in law generally obeyed it.
    In early 70s in Delhi as a newly married I could take my wife to night show in Sheila theater sir in Cannaught place till 9 PM. No one accosted us.
    Then things deteriorated. We had the Chopra kids being killed, everyone scared Indra Gandhi her autocratic rule, corruption is world over statement, every one grabbing everything.
    By 1980s my father's house in Chennai was " ha that one next to Mr X an upstart congress politician who started his life as a plumber and became a millioner though congress had lost power 20 years earlier.

    I am just recollecting that may be were not a rich country, but we had everything a human being wanted freedom, security, and humanity.

    Things are changing again. I had given up all hope of seeing a fair corruption free just India but my country is coming back and I am.happy to see it in my life time, may be not the super power bit but atleast the road to it.

    1. Typing in a mobile with autocorrect feature gives strange sentences. Manual correction now.
      1 We all ate ( not are) together
      2 theater sit in ( not sir)

      Old fashioned to correct but optimist about my India

    2. super writing. You should write more

  8. once in Bangsar, Kuala Lumpur i was trying to cross road with parents in a hurry (typical Indian style always in a hurry when on the road). My fault coz a car was just trying to pass by. Women who was driving instead of honking and showing anger put break, and smiled. Gestured us to pass.All cars stopped no one honked.After we all crossed i heard one honk. But it was to get my attention, the women in carlooked at me smiled and waved good bye. Is this is the way they breathe life outside India. What i hv grown up with living in Bihar is everybody is on the run on roads, honking abusing prespiring.
    Now i work in Nepal. And i have to fly to kathmandu once every month. Lonely planet travel has listed ktm as one of top places to visit in world in 2017. Its strange coz this place is dirty, poor, no akshardham, no taj mahal. still Agra or Jaipur or kerala didnt even find a place in the list.
    I just tried to analyse why? We have so much, still zero. Probably its becoz Indians r forgetting to breathe Life. They hv lost their greatest possesion, their souls. Trying to find solace in diamonds.And easy money is the new God they worship.
    Indians coming to Thamel in kathmandu i have seen is to visit bars whère nude girls dance. The westeners enjoy the real thing, the energy that is alive at thamel.

    1. very true. We are all in a hurry for money but no time for even a smile. I relate to you completely

    2. very true. We are all in a hurry for money but no time for even a smile. I relate to you completely

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